Monday, October 21, 2013

Can we Please Talk About Menopause for a Minute?

First off...
I apologize in advance to any of you ladies out there who after reading this, may feel a hormone fueled urge to squeeze my head until it bursts. Apology accepted? Okay then, here we go.  

I've discovered yet another reason that makes me so very darn happy (thank you very much), that I am NOT a woman! My wife wasn't so lucky though. Her menopause appears to be more of a chronic condition rather than something that will pass. 

Either way
I should NOT have to dress
Like I'm about to climb Mount Everest
While sitting in my living room 
In the middle of winter
When it's freezing outside 
With all the windows open
And the air conditioner is on full blast
While my wife is dressed in summer clothes 
And mopping sweat off of her head and neck
While she says things like
"It's so HOT in here!
Over and over and over
While I am dangerously close to frostbite

It's a touchy subject to be sure. Luckily, I've learned a thing or two in our time together. One of them is to quietly slip into my parka and just sit there quietly shivering.

Of course, I wasn't always this smart. I used to say things like "it's not hot at all, it's just you!" Remarks like that were never accepted with open arms by my wife. Not even if I ended the sentence with "honey" or "my love."  Geez!

I'll get back to our travels soon. Right now I just need to know something.

Is it just me?



.




45 comments:

Genie Robinson said...

NO! My husband sufferED, too Thank goodness it is behind us both. Loved the post. I did giggle a bit.

Sally in WA said...

I got a nice chuckle out of your post. You are such a good husband.

Shelly said...

"One of them is to quietly slip into my parka and just sit there quietly shivering." You are a wise man.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

My wife got warm at night for maybe six months and then it was over. Ironically, it's usually the opposite. She's freezing and I'm about to melt. And yes, I win the battle of the thermostat.
Really sorry, Pat. Yeah, don't tell her it's her. They don't want to hear that...

TexWisGirl said...

my poor mil had hot flashes for the rest of her life. bless her soul...

Sylvia K said...

What a hoot and just the giggles I needed to start my day, Pat!!! I'm one of the lucky ones, menopause came and went without me ever noticing??? But I was/am grateful!! Time for you two to get on the road again!!

buymebarbies said...

Okay, so in my defense......Pat doesn't like using the AC, even in the summer time, while the whole neighborhood enjoys their homes, with their AC's blaring away (yes, I can hear them). He gets a thrill checking the electric bill and seeing that we just so happened to use the least amount of electricity for the month!! Uh, NO! If we were blessed with AC, then we're using it when all the cats are tucked away in the closets, hidden away from everything, including the heat! Sorry Honey! (did it help using honey?)

Ms. A said...

You're a good man, Pat. Just keep putting on that parka and end every sentence in, "my love." This too shall pass... eventually.

TheChieftess said...

I have only one thing to say...
bio identical hormones...
life savers...literally!!!

Kay said...

I was pretty lucky...I went through menopause with very little symptoms. My late husband said he was glad because once I was in menopause, I no longer got PMS. He hated me when I had PMS (LOL).

Bouncin Barb said...

From someone who literally drips sweat off her face walking through Walmart for groceries, I'd say no, you are not alone. But only the smart ones slip into their parkas quietly!!

Jenny said...

Oh Pat!

You are a nut!

I have utmost sympathy for your wife. Menopause is NOT for sissies...or warm blooded husbands!

California Girl said...

We lived in San Diego when my mom was going through it. S.D. is known for its beautiful temperate 68degree avg yr round weather. She was flipping on the central A/C & complaining nonstop. I really didnt understand until I went through it. THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO.

Btw, men get it too.

Brian said...

Well, I did have Erect Tail Dysfunction once!

Pat Tillett said...

Genie - It's good to know that I'm not alone. Can't wait until it is behind me!

Sally - I'm glad you enjoyed it! As to me being a good husband, I'd say I do pretty well, but I'm not sure if there consensus on it.

Shelly - Thanks Shelly! I guess I had to wise up sometime.

Alex - Sometimes it's the reverse here as well. I never win the thermostat! Probably never will...

TexWisGirl - That must really be hard for her. I hope it's not that way here.

Sylvia - I'm happy to be of service Sylvia! We are out for two weeks right now! In the desert close to Joshua Tree National Park.

My Love - Yes honey! That's right honey! Anything you say honey! (who knew that delusions were part of menopause!)

Pat Tillett said...

Ms A. - Thanks my friend! I'm wearing one now! I hope it passes soon.

TheChieftess - Great! I'll start taking them right away. Oh, you mean for my wife?

Kay - that was good for both of you. As to my situation, no comment!

Bouncin Barb - I'm sure that is not a comfortable feeling. I always keep my parka close by!

Jenny - I've been called that and worse! I really am glad that I don't have to suffer through it.

California Girl - We live just up the coast from there in South Orange County. It's the same weather where we live as in San Diego. I'll just continue to grin and bear it.

Pat Tillett said...

Ms A. - Thanks my friend! I'm wearing one now! I hope it passes soon.

TheChieftess - Great! I'll start taking them right away. Oh, you mean for my wife?

Kay - that was good for both of you. As to my situation, no comment!

Bouncin Barb - I'm sure that is not a comfortable feeling. I always keep my parka close by!

Jenny - I've been called that and worse! I really am glad that I don't have to suffer through it.

California Girl - We live just up the coast from there in South Orange County. It's the same weather where we live as in San Diego. I'll just continue to grin and bear it.

Esther Montgomery said...

Your wife is unlucky enough to be a woman? Hm.

Being female has its challenges all the way through. Maybe nature made the menopause so visible and so uncomfortable in order to make sure spouses will share, briefly and companionably, a bit of this pain. It's a last chance before their wives are liberated. So - wear your parka with pride while you bring her flowers and presents and (maybe?) cups of tea.

robin andrea said...

Have you ever heard of male menopause? Yes, it's a misnomer, and should rightly be called "andropause." It does happen: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/male-menopause/MC00058

I once worked for a women's health clinic that specialized in hormone-related issues. I remember thinking at the time, there really should be a night-time phone tree for all the women who were wide awake for hours with hormone-induced insomnia. Hot flashes and night sweats are bummer. You are kind to put on the parka and keep those windows wide open. That's love and support!

Al said...

LOL! In my world it's never too cold - I could happily sit in a room at 50 degrees or less.

sometimesthatsallyouget said...

After going through menopause for longer than necessary, I was finally informed that it was my thyroid causing my hot flashes (and I've been taking thyroid meds for 20 years). In order to treat my thyroid better, I was placed on a gluten-free diet and then advanced to a paleo diet. My warm moments are few and far between now - only when I accidentally encounter a food I shouldn't eat.

Best of luck! I hope your dear bride can find relief as it is equally uncomfortable for her.

~Lindy

Laura Delegal - Leroy Photography said...

Ha! Ask my hubby about driving down the road in winter with the heat on and then being told to turn on the air conditioner and roll down the windows!

Cezar and Léia said...

gosh...Poor girl!
I'm terrified now! Better take a breath and think positively about the future!
Léia

Lolamouse said...

As someone who rolled down her car windows to get a little fresh air in the middle of Feb. last winter, I advise you to learn to love parkas!

Baby Sister said...

Lol. Good luck!! I hope it doesn't stick around too long...I've heard that menopause can be horrible for all involved.

PerthDailyPhoto said...

Ah sometimes, not often, it's no fun being a woman :)))))

Pasadena Adjacent said...

I kind of like the hot flashes. Makes me feel like I'm electric

EG CameraGirl said...

Thanks for making me smile...and I'm impressed that you don your coat so your wife can keep the windows open. ;)

Stewart M said...

You may be on thin ice here!!

I share your pain!


Cheers - Stewart M - Australia

PS: I did not think my puns were bad!

Al Penwasser said...

Mrs. Penwasser hasn't gone through menopause yet, but I think she's close.
I've got my eye on her. And have plenty of sweaters on standby.

Chuck said...

Thankfully I like it cold in the house too so this has not been an issue at all...some of us is just lucky that's all!!

But I know what you're saying :)

Stickup Artist said...

Smile, breathe and go slowly. – Thich Nhat Hanh

:-)

sage said...

It appears you're swimming in dangerous waters!

Pat Tillett said...

Esther - You are probably right Esther. Say it loud! I'm cold and I'm proud. Parka Power!

Robin - I do what I can Robin! My wife says she is very grateful that she hasn't ever had the night sweats. That doesn't sound like fun at all.

Al - Normally, I would agree with you. But the actual temperature seems to mean nothing in my house anymore.

sometimesthatsallyouget - My wife just started thyroid meds. So far, nothing has changed. I read somewhere that many problems start with our thyroid gland. Paelo diet? Does that mean dino burgers?

Laura - HA! I don't have to ask him Laura, because I've been there and done that.

Leia - That's right! My wife thought it wasn't going to happen to her.

Mynx said...

As my husband found out, you are damned if you do and damned if you don't when it comes to the nightmare hormonal mood swings and hot flushes of a menopausal woman.
Happily my hot flushes are rare now although I still sometimes feel the need to throw all the covers off so I can cool down, promptly smothering him before hauling them all back again.
Hope the symptoms ease soon, she is feeling it worse than you

Kato Pandorah's Box said...

Oh god...I am not looking forward to this time in my life....oh well.

And you are a very wise man....just go with it!

Pat Tillett said...

Lolamouse - I think you are right! I should buy them in different colors to match every outfit.

Baby Sister - Thanks Amanda! You are right, but I do know that it's worse for my wife.

PerthDailyPhoto - All in all, I'm really glad I'm not a woman. I don't think I'm tough enough!

Pasadena Adjacent - Ha! I sing the body electric...

EG CameraGirl - My pleasure! Don't be impressed though. It has to be pretty darn cold for me to put a jacket on. I only wear long pants about once or twice a month. Even in winter. I'm lucky to live in a very mild climate.

Stewart - Yep! I believe you are correct. Just bear the pain!

Pat Tillett said...

Al - By that time I should have some broken in parkas for you!

Chuck - I also like it cold in the house. That really helps. To a point...

Stickup Artist - Thanks! That is what I try to do everyday. Not enough people know who Thich Nhat Hanh is.

sage - Indeed! I'll probably never bring the subject up again.

Betty Manousos said...

thanks for making me smile..
lol good luck!it's wonderful to be a woman, isn't it?:))

Pat Tillett said...

Betty M - My pleasure! I'm glad I'll never actually experience just how good it is.

TS Hendrik said...

Haha, that's hilarious. I can picture you trekking through your living room with frost in a beard, ready to stake a flag.

Liz said...

Ha!! You're a good hubby, Pat! I do know that when my time comes, I have a hubby who will do the same.
Enjoy your parka!! ;)

Carly said...

Where my husband works they keep it at 66 deg, and I prefer 80, so we have a/c disagreements from time to time. Usually we compromise at 77, so I understand just a little bit.

Pat Tillett said...

TS Hendrik - I look like Admiral Byrd.

Liz - Hey, I guess we knew what we were signing up for. Thanks!

Carly - I wish the range of temperature differences was that small for us. My wife and I are on far ends of the spectrum.

Gingerspark said...

Too funny.
Hubby has always loved the heat - me? not so much.

I never turn the heat off. I just dress in layers and if the minimal layers aren't cool enough I go outside (-17C / 1F)