Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Winter Moonlight


Winter moonlight
Casts an ivory glow
Upon your hair
As it lay web like
Across my pillow
The night has taken you
I lay waiting for dawn
Alone

.

37 comments:

  1. So sad and lovely...whether it is a Dylanesque metaphor for dying or a meditation on sleep. Having insomnia next to your partner can make you feel very lonely when all you want to do is wake them up and tell them you can't sleep, but you know that doing that would be selfish. - G

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  2. This is such an enticing and wonderful poem, Pat. The imagery is vivid, the texture and language so profound and beautiful. The photograph compliments the eerie and haunting mystery of your piece brilliantly.

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  3. Beautiful photo and delightful words, Pat.

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  4. Dang, is that your photo? Takes my breath away. Well, well done.

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  5. You've left me speachless.

    That photo almost doesn't even look real.

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  6. Georgina - Thanks so much!

    Sam - Thanks Sam! Coming from you, I am honored...

    Pam - Thanks, I'll take credit for the words, but not the photo...

    altadenahiker - I wish it was!

    Cara - Thanks, I agree about the photo, I think the moon, may be the only thing "real" in it...

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  7. Great picture of the full moon, Pat... And your poem is GREAT... You are just so talented.
    Betsy

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  8. The perfect balance of beauty and sadness in the image you paint with your words. :)

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  9. Lovely picture and poem, Patrick!

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  10. Love it. Did you write it? I like the scene you paint using the pillow as the subject. Very unique. Very Browning.

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  11. Betsy - I'll take credit for the poem only... No way I could take a photo that good of the moon, I don't even own a tripod!

    RA - Why thank you!

    BB - Thanks my friend! I don't know where I got the pic from, but it's not mine.

    copyboy - I did in fact write it. Thanks!

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  12. Lovely, and so evocative. Thanks, Pat!

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  13. *Le Sigh*.. in a word..Beautiful..
    both your words and the photo.
    thank you for this slice of beauty

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  14. This reminds me of watching a loved one die, an all too real experience for some of us. I know it's a misread but the moment is the same with only a more grave longing. good write my friend

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  15. Another great poem!
    And I see you have added a cool 'Ask me' app now...I would love to hear what kind of things they are asking you!
    Your blog just keeps getting better and better...I can't compete, so I concede!!

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  16. Talli - Thanks! Evocative is my middle name...lol

    Lynne - Thanks Lynne!

    Wings - Thanks so much!

    Nat - Thanks!

    Jhon - It's not as much of a misread as you might think...

    Joe - Thanks my friend! I didn't advertise the button, so no questions yet! Nah, I think you already passed me with your new "upgrade." It's awesome!

    Andrea - thanks so much!

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  17. Beautiful but sad! Good writing for sure.
    You sound like a man of many talents.

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  18. I want to take a photo like that someday! Great verse...my wife liked it too.

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  19. This IS beautiful, Pat. I love it. (change lay to lies/lie and it'll be perfect. Sorry, but I had to say this; I used to teach grammar)

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  20. Last night I needed to run down the road that is our driveway, to the main road to throw one last bag intot the garbage before the truck picked up this morning. When I turned to go back (sans torch) what was before me was an enormous violet sky lit by the most gorgeous full moon. I wish I had known your poem last evening.
    But I know it now.

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  21. The moon and poetry..
    a perfect match.

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  22. Good work Pat, very nice addition to the photo.

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  23. Pat I love, love, love everything about this...the poem and the image. It is really difficult to say so much with so few words...it really is an art.

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  24. dot - Thanks for the nice words.

    Chuck - Me too! Thanks!

    Ann - Of course you are correct, but I used the word "lay" because of the way the sentence flowed. In addition, the standard rules of grammar don't always apply to poetry. As a grammar teacher, I'm sure you know this.

    Why did you feel the need to correct me via a comment, instead of email, or not at all? I am not one of your "grammar" students or children and I certainly didn't ask you to edit my writing...

    Entre Nous - What a nice surprise that must have been, it sounds beautiful. We have a huge moon here tonight also...

    faye - Thanks so much!

    Jimmy - thanks Jimmy, I wish I'd taken the photo, it's perfect for the poem.

    DrSoosie - Thanks for the nice words. I try to keep them short (most of the time)

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  25. An exquisite piece, Pat. Need I say more?

    Nevine

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  26. Your picture? Gorgeous!

    Your Poem? Beautiful and soulful

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  27. Very stupid of me. You have every right to chastise me. I'm glad you did, and I truly apologize.

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  28. This is lovely, Pat. Photo and thoughts. Thank you for sharing this!

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  29. This is great. One very powerful image makes a great poem. My favorite part is the hair "as it lay web like / Across my pillow"

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  30. Nevin - Thanks so much!

    Katherine - Thanks! The poem is mine, sadly the photo is not! Thanks for signing on and commenting. I appreciate it!

    Ann - Don't give it another thought. We're good...

    Brenda - Thanks! It's my pleasure.

    Sarah - Thanks so much for the nice words. Also, thanks for sifting through the old stuff on my blog also!

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  31. Haunting.

    One of my favorite poems of all time is Annabel Lee by Edgar Allan Poe. When I read your poem that one come to mind.

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  32. SQ - Thanks! I love that poem. I hadn't thought about it in a long time, but as soon as I did the last stanza and particularly the last line once again slapped me...

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  33. This is beautiful Pat.
    Have you ever thought of putting all your work in book form? (Maybe you already have....if not- you should.) Your work touches the heart- which is what poetry was meant to do. You do it well!

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  34. Dawn - I thought about it, but it seems like a ton of work. Thanks so much for the kind words...

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